Well fine if that's what you wanna talk about, that's what we'll talk about, sex. Just keep in mind sex only plays a small part in the actual ancient texts of Tantra, but because we're all have a collective, naughty mind, let's just focus on the naughty. But what exactly is Tantric sex? And how can you use elements of this style of getting down to make yourself a better lover? All in good time.
First, let's talk a little bit about the premise of this whole thing. Tantra has roots in ancient Indian (like from India) times, like 5th Century AD kinda ancient. This is not going to be a lecture on ancient philosophy and religion though, so excuse me if I skip over some details. Basically the ancient yogic texts were all about the search for Samadhi (enlightenment). Most of the traditional philosophies believed that in order to reach this state of pure consciousness, one had to go above and beyond the temptations and pleasures of a normal human existence. This meant going beyond good and bad, right and wrong, pain and pleasure etc. Only by commiting oneself to this lifestyle could one go beyond this state of normal human existence into this higher level of consciousness.
Tantra arose as an alternative viewpoint from this more traditional sect. Though it was not originally focused on sex (as it's now usually associated), what tantrics believed was you could use certain elements of the human experience to also elevate yourself to this higher plain.
If you've ever had an orgasm (and let's hope for your sake you have) you know that in those brief few moments of ectasy, the entire world goes blank. Your mind completely clears, and for a brief second, you enter into another state of consciousness. You are completely and utterly in the present moment, totally conscious, and then... it's gone. So Tantric Sex attempts to train oneself to extend these moments. Women have a natural advantage, which is why they were revered in the tantric community. Multiple orgasms really are a thing of beauty when you're trying to get closer to enlightenment... or whatever. Men unfortunately aren't so naturally gifted. We get a small glimpse at the light, then it's over from anywhere from five minutes to an hour (depending). However, there is hope! With proper training a willing partner, and lot's and lot's of practice (poor you I know), you can tap into your inner tantric God, and be well on your way to finding Samadhi (or just having really awesome sex). With that in mind I present:
"Tantra For Dummies: 3 Quick Tips To Tap Into Your Tantric Orgasm, And Start Your Journey Towards Being A Sex God!"
3. The 80% Rule
This is the most straight forward and most simple intro tip. When practising to channel your inner tantra, treat sex like it's a scale. Imagine 0-100%, 0 obviously being nothing, and 100% being that brief moment you have your final "Vinegar Stoke" (The League Anyone?). For men the key is staying in a certain range, you feel good enough that you can stay um, at "attention" but not so good that you cross the point of no return. This is why having a excited, willing partner is key. When you first start out on your road to tantric glory, you will need to take some breaks along the way. Breaks are cool if your partner is on board, not so cool if it's some chick you picked up at the bar, who is wondering why you keep pulling out and breathing hard every five minutes.
For Tantric Sex you have to refine what it means to have an orgasm. For men we associate the orgasm with ejaculation, but these are actually two seperate processes which through a life of training we've become accustomed to having mere nanoseconds apart. In reality, the chemicals released in our brain upon orgasm and the release of sperm from the ejaculatory ducts are two seperate occurrences. So by training ourselves in this 80% zone we can learn to control this impulse, and eventually seperate it. With practice (lots and lots of practice) you can slowly increase your pleasure threshold past the 80% mark into 90 even 95%. Resulting in the chemical release associated with the orgasm, without the physical release typically associated with the orgasm. With lots of practice and commitment (life is hard I know) you can actually train yourself to experience the male equivalent of the female multiple orgasm. Just be careful, even with a bunch of training the threshold still exists, and once you pass it, anatomically there's no going back. So if you're planning on practicing the Tantric "Pull-Out Method" just be wary, let's just say, "accidents" can happen.
This one is a little more tricky. If you want to look a little farther into it, simply google "Tantric Sublimation" and you can spend a few hours looking up different techniques and guides to keeping cool under pressure. In lamens terms what this basically means is "tighten that shit up". Sublimation is a Yogic and Tantric process of moving energy up through our bodily system. Without getting too sophisticated this essentially means practicing tighetening techniques of the prostate gland and the urethra (the hole in your ding-dong).
As you continue to practice and engage with your partner, you use these breathing and tightening techniques to move the flow of energy away from your downstairs, upwards. There's a variety of ways to do this, but a few are more effective then others. Like I said hop on google and check some out for yourself. Just to give you an idea, imagine your partner is on top. It's starting to feel, really, really good, pushing past your 80% threshold. By focusing on tighetening the muscles downstairs and taking deep breaths, you can attempt to overcome these sensations and move the energy away before it's too late. The key again is making sure you have someone who is on board (literally and figuratively) so they won't question all those strange faces you're making. Which brings us to our last tip.
If you're really committed to giving Tantra a shot, the biggest thing you need is partner who's on board. Doesn't matter if it's a long time girl friend, former babysitter, or maybe just some chick who was doing yoga poses on Tinder, having a willing, enthusiastic partner is key. Make sure you have discussed this and they know what they're getting into, but honestly if you say "I wanna get better at sex so we can have marathon sessions together", they probably won't argue. Also realize, this is something that takes time, and it goes against everything we see in our "normal" exposure to all things sexual. There are no "money shots" in Tantric Sex, well, at least there's not "supposed" to be.
Once you've found a partner and they've agreed, just realize at first things can be a little frustrating. Many women struggle to have an orgasm period, so the idea of prolonging yours might sound all well and good, until she's super close and you decide it's time to pull out and sublimate. But focus on the long game, make sure your partner knows what they're getting in for, and the rest is all about practice.
So go out there, get someone willing, and get to it!